Monday, December 26, 2016

NO DATE 28: A Year Dedicated to the Lord and the Preparation


      A few days ago I sat back and I knew that I heard God clearly when He told me that this year was the year that I would completely dedicate to him. I turned 28 on November 30th and I started to feel as if I wasn't where I needed to be. A lot of the people that I know that are my age are either married, getting married, have children or already have children. Approaching 30 seemed scary, especially since I did not have anyone that I felt as if I would be married to in my 30's.
      When God spoke to me, it was one of the most refreshing things that I had ever heard. Sometimes we as people put a timeline on God. We have to graduate college, find our dream job, get married and have children by a certain age. We have these plans when a lot of the time God's plan is different.  His plan is for us to have the best life possible. God orchestrates our lives on a level that we will never understand. If you take a look in your rearview mirror of life and think about every heartbreak, rejection and failure it eventually made you better. God wants better for me and he wants better for you.

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
-Jeremiah 29:11

       When God put it on my heart to not date this year I thought about it for days. I then realized that I am not in the position to be a wife no matter how much I desired it. There are things emotionally, spiritually and mentally that I have to resolve before marriage. I have to fix me and love me unconditionally before I let anyone else in.  In the past, relationships distracted me and I found myself venturing away from my faith because I never dated with a purpose. I dated to please the person that I was with because I wanted to feel accepted and loved. I wanted to hear that I was beautiful and that I was the best because I did not feel this way about myself.
      I am so excited  for this upcoming year! God is teaching me how to really love myself, live with a purpose and love with a purpose. I know that what God has for me is far beyond my wildest imagination. And if God is calling me to fast from dating I will, especially if that means that I will grow closer to Him.
      This doesn't mean that I am giving up on love or never dating again. I know that God has someone special that he is preparing for me. If God is preparing my husband for me, why not allow God to prepare me for him. I don't want to baggage of my past to weigh down my marriage. I want to be free throughout this journey and know him like never before.  I believe that I can and I believe that I will.

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